Monday, July 5, 2010

CONFESSION: I am NOT SuperMOM

I've finally realized and will have to admit, that I am NOT SuperMom!

You know how you think you'll be able to do everything in your life and then are shocked when it dawns on you, you actually can't do it all? Well, I am at that point.

I'm also a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. Everything. Can I just say how amazingly grateful I am that there was a printing glitch with my book?
Honestly.

Okay, so at first, I was bummed--but now, NOW! Holy cow. I'm so relieved I'm not on tour at this moment in my life, because there is no physical way I could've done it. None at all.

So what I didn't tell anyone and have been keeping secret, so as not to needlessly worry you all is--I developed Preeclampsia during my pregnancy. For those of you who don't know what it is--it's a disease that only shows up in pregnant women, and it can lead to strokes, seizures, and aneurysms. Basically it's life threatening to the mother and can potentially kill you and the baby. (It's not a joke. And it's not something to be treated lightly either. If you hear of a mom who has or had preeclampsia, treat her very, very kindly. And make her rest!) I was in completely denial of how potentially dangerous this was.

Until the birth of my daughter. Which thankfully, thanks to the awesome doctor I had went off very smoothly. However, my recovery has not been. Shortly after my "un-book" launch party, I became very ill. And for weeks was flat on my back in bed. I could barely form coherent sentences, let along write anything! lol! And I slept for days and days while my body recovered from this disease.

I'm still a little out of it. My little one turns 7 weeks this week and I'm still finding myself a bit narcoleptic at times. Yes, my new best friend is my pillow. I won't go into all the scary details of the ifs and whens and what did happen while I was prego and after--since I did have a couple of very close calls--I'm just very grateful the Lord has taken care of me and my family at this time.
And I'm extremely overwhelmed and grateful to see that sometimes a trial as silly as NOT having your book launched when you thought it would be, can be such a blessing in disguise. I'm amazed at the love I feel every time I think of what would've happened to me--and my wee lil baby, trying to tour the USA right now (every other day on a new plane and in a new hotel) there is no way we could've done it.

I have finally given up and hung up my cape--I'm not supermom. And I'm not sure I want to be anymore. My publisher has asked me to go on tour this fall--but holding my baby in my arms, and seeing her sweet coos and smiles, I've decided not to. In fact, I've asked if I can go on tour next year when Pride & Popularity releases instead. No one knows me yet. It's basically the last year I've got to be completely anonymous, so I might as well enjoy the time I have with my family before I won't have a choice anymore and I'll have to go on tours.

The point is, I'm still going to have a book released--(yes, it's coming! lol! I promise!--though it's looking like it won't be until fall now. I'll keep you posted!) it may not be when I thought and when it was advertised for, but it isn't going to hurt my career in the long run, or jeopardize me in any way, other than make me swallow my pride and teach me patience! lol! However, it not coming out when it did--may have just saved my life--as preeclampsia is triggered greatly by stress. And thankfully, miraculously, I have the big guy upstairs watching out for me and reminding me that yeah, life isn't always the way it's planned, but it's His plan in the end and His is always the best.

Jenni James
Former SuperMom.
Now just mom.

25 comments:

  1. Awesome post, Jenni. It really is amazing the way things work out sometimes. Glad you're doing ok!

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  2. Oh, sweetie. I'm so glad you're okay now. I was very sick after my second child was born and I know how doubly terrifying it is because every instinct wants to take care of the baby when your body just isn't up to it.

    I think you made the right decision, and I agree with you. We just can't see the big picture and that minor disappointment could save you from something else. It's a far smaller scale but I tell myself that every time I hit red light after red light. The big guy is watching out for you. Enjoy your baby(ies).

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  4. Jenni, glad to hear you are a little better and sad to hear you were so sick. Take care of yourself. You kids need you. And yes, God always makes sure we have what we need, even when we don't know we need it--in this case the book release being delayed.

    However, don't forget you are a supermom. Yes, you are. You prove it by choosing to take care of yourself and your kids instead of trying to do a book tour when that could jeopardize your health, and in consequence your family.

    Take care and rest.

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  5. I'm so glad to hear you're safe and sound now - or at least on the mend! My sister in law had preeclampsia and it was awful. I wish you the best and look forward to the book's release in the fall. :)

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  6. Wow! I had no idea, but I'm not surprised either! That is a lot of stress to be dealing with. Just glad that everything turned out ok in the end! Glad you're ok and your sweet baby is ok! And all the rest of us will be waiting patiently for your book.

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  7. I'm glad for the delay in your book coming out for your health's sake. I'm sorry for what you've been through. I hope your recovery doesn't take much longer.

    I gave up on supermom status long ago. I'm just mom, too. It's a good thing to be.

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  8. Jenni, I am glad to hear that you are doing better. I am sorry for all the stress you have had to face. But yes it is always great when the Lord blesses us with what we need, especially when what we want just might be the death of us. His eternal perspective has saved me from myself more than once.

    I still think you are supermom even if you aren't invincible.

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  9. Love your guts, Jenni! :-) I still think you're super mom - especially with EVERYTHING you've been handling and getting through.

    Can't wait until August and our girls night out! :-)

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  10. You'll always be super mom in my eyes! LOL! Just admitting that you can't do everything does take superpowers sometimes. I'm glad you are getting the time to bond with your new bundle of joy.

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  11. I hope you get feeling back to your amazing self very soon. Sometimes we think we can do everything, and maybe we almost can, if we take enough time. But I know that no one can do everything at the same time.

    I really doubt you'll be sorry for taking time and having wisdom. Your family and your body will thank you. Your fans will still be there when you're ready to dish out your enthusiasm.

    Kiss that pretty little girl for me. I still think she's going to turn blonde ;)

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  12. I've looked back o a lot of the disappointments in my life and once they were behind me, I could see exactly why things fell the way they did. It is truly amazing how we are looked after.
    Thanks for sharing.

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  13. That is great that you know what you want right now and that you are not compromising yourself by doing something else. You have given birth to your baby and to your book(s). I am sure you care for both in just the perfect way. The Camp Host Housewife and Photographer

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  14. It's amazing what can seem like bad news really turns out to be a blessing in disguise. You're amazing and just worry about taking care of yourself and that baby. The rest will fall into place.

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  15. A blessing in disguise! I'm glad you're okay though...Grandma told me you'd had toxemia, but I didn't know that there were complications even after giving birth! How scary!
    I'm glad you're good though, and that through this little miracle, you can have lots of family time before you're famous! ;)

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  16. It is amazing how things can work out and happen for a reason... Congratulations on baby and take care of yourself x

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  17. Oh, you've been through a lot. Hugs!

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  18. Thank you everyone!

    I'm here in New Mexico now, taking some much needed R&R with my parents. The kids are having a blast with grandma and grandpa... and I'm enjoying being home again.

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  19. Glad all is well! Thinking of you!

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  20. No body perfect in the world.. :)

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  21. Jenni, luv

    As far as I'm concerned, you're still a super mom. Love you.

    Stella

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  22. I'm glad you and your baby are okay. Your story touched me, please stay strong!

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  23. I hope you are recovering well, and starting to feel well again. Take care!

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  24. I am a newbie at blogging and such, and mostly a lurker:) Doing research I ended up at your blog(how, I do not know,lol) and this post touched me. I am interested in reading your books too, lol, I LOVE Jane Austen and I am curious how a modern take would transform the classics.:0)
    As for the whole pregnancy complications and the timing it can be discouraging and exhausting, but I love your attitude and perspective. It is refreshing and inspiring. There is a strength of spirit coming through your words. I am sorry you are unwell, but that was highlighted for me as I read. Cheers and hugs from a stranger.:) Sunny

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  25. Jenni, *hugs*. I'm sorry to hear that you've developed such an awful thing. You're such a shining example to me (Still) because of your positive attitude.

    Yes, you, Ms Jenni, need to be good to yourself, too. Rest. Enjoy. Live! You're book can wait and remember that you did it for fun. (I know you have no problem with that). The money from it will be an added benefit.

    Take care and don't forget me!!!!

    Elizabeth Mueller

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